Dick Nixon on the GOP debate: Trump scores and Rubio just looks lost

Dick Nixon on the GOP debate: Trump scores and Rubio just looks lost

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Rubio is hiding something.

No, no, the lawyers won’t like that. Let me clarify: Rubio doesn’t know who he is.

(Editor’s note: Here President Nixon paused the telephone call to confer with counsel. He returned five minutes later.)

Honestly, Rubio is easy to understand. Imagine a fellow wants to sell you a chair. It looks fine, sturdy, but it’s just like the chair in your office. You ask him how it’s different and he swears to God it is. He just swears, and swears, and swears again until you give in.

He runs as the “new generation,” which is rich when his foreign policy is the Bush/Cheney thing dolled up in that dumb zip sweater. It gives him the appearance of a choir director or field hockey coach whose hobbies include gardening, cooking and working to bomb Shanghai Read more…

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Dick Nixon on the GOP debate: Trump scores and Rubio just looks lost

Donald Trump combined with Dolores Umbridge is as disturbing as you'd expect

Donald Trump combined with Dolores Umbridge is as disturbing as you’d expect

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LONDON — Prepare yourselves for this one.

There are some celebrity mashups that end up working so eerily well that they get sort of ingrained in your mind, and the unlikely combination of Harry Potter‘s Dolores Umbridge and Republican presidential hopeful Donald Trump definitely falls into that category.

Imgur user IlovegrumpycatandIdontcare created the following monstrosity, which has racked up more than 100,000 views in one day.

Behold, “Trumpbridge”

Trumpbridge

Nooooooo

Oh God, our eyes.

Have something to add to this story? Share it in the comments. Read more…

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Donald Trump combined with Dolores Umbridge is as disturbing as you’d expect

Loser Donald Trump's tweet about losers comes back to haunt him

Loser Donald Trump’s tweet about losers comes back to haunt him

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Donald Trump will never eat his words but perhaps he should delete his tweets

While Trump predicted a historic victory in Iowa caucuses, just three hours after the caucuses began, the major networks declared Ted Cruz the winner. Cruz is currently ahead of Trump 27.6% to 24.3%. That leaves Trump in second place, making him — using one of his very favorite epithets — a loser.

Just one year ago, Trump had this to say about second-place:

.

Trump is still predicted to do well in New Hampshire. But his loss here was noticed by everyone — except, perhaps, by the candidate himself, who added a new note to his usual “winner” refrain Read more…

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Loser Donald Trump’s tweet about losers comes back to haunt him

Donald Trump faces new test: Will people vote for a loser?

Donald Trump faces new test: Will people vote for a loser?

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WEST DES MOINES, Iowa — Donald Trump’s whole campaign has been based on winning. But after a major setback in Iowa, he’s now going to have to cope with being seen as a loser — at least for now.

Trump’s disappointing second-place finish in the key early-voting state on Monday night, barely ahead of Marco Rubio, comes after recent polls showed him ahead of Ted Cruz. He’s now facing huge pressure to hold onto his lead in New Hampshire, where recent polls have him with three times the support of any of his competitors.

Trump was remarkably gracious and restrained — and unusually brief — as he sought to portray the setback as a victory after he barely finished ahead of Marco Rubio in the state. Read more…

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Donald Trump faces new test: Will people vote for a loser?

Donald Trump, you're the loser: Cruz wins Iowa

Donald Trump, you’re the loser: Cruz wins Iowa

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WEST DES MOINES, Iowa — Ted Cruz has won Iowa’s GOP caucuses, giving the hardline conservative senator a huge boost in his quest for the Republican nomination and making a loser of Donald Trump.

The Associated Press has called the state for Cruz who led Trump 27.7% – 24.4% with 84% of precincts reporting. Marco Rubio was in third place with 23%.

“Tonight is a victory for the grassroots,” Cruz declared, portraying himself as the second coming of Ronald Reagan. “Whatever Washington says, they cannot keep the people down.” Read more…

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Donald Trump, you’re the loser: Cruz wins Iowa

One man's final request: Don't vote for Trump

One man’s final request: Don’t vote for Trump

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Jeffrey Cohen passed away at the age of 70 on Sunday, leaving quite the obituary behind.

The Pittsburgh chiropractor began his obituary by discussing his main philosophy: “The meaning of life is ‘OOPS!'”

Cohen founded the Nimmo Educational Foundation, which carries out research on chronic pain and offers care for people who are in need of physical therapy. His detailed obituary also explained that he was a chiropractor for celebrities such as “Weird Al” Yankovic and Liza Minelli.

The obituary then took a humorous twist when Cohen requested, “in lieu of flowers, please do not vote for Donald Trump. (Also acceptable — donations to the Nimmo Educational Foundation…or a charity of your choice.)” Read more…

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One man’s final request: Don’t vote for Trump

Bromance over: Trump attacks Cruz, gets booed at Tea Party convention

Bromance over: Trump attacks Cruz, gets booed at Tea Party convention

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MYRTLE BEACH, South Carolina — Donald Trump closed his speech to the South Carolina Tea Party Convention with a dig at Ted Cruz — and got booed by a good chunk of the activist audience.

“You give a campaign contribution to Ted Cruz and he gives you whatever the hell you want, okay, whatever you want,” he said as some people began booing.

“Excuse me, excuse me. He didn’t report his bank loans. Excuse me. Say whatever you want, he didn’t report his bank loans, he got bank loans from Goldman Sachs, he got bank loans from Citibank, and then he acts like Robin Hood,” Trump said as the boos grew louder and some of his allies began yelling his name in response. “Say whatever you want, but it doesn’t work that way.” Read more…

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Bromance over: Trump attacks Cruz, gets booed at Tea Party convention

Trump blasts Cruz on Twitter over Canadian birth and campaign loans

Trump blasts Cruz on Twitter over Canadian birth and campaign loans

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MYRTLE BEACH, S.C. — Donald Trump took to Twitter to flay Ted Cruz on Saturday morning, just hours before the pair of GOP front-runners are set to square off at a Tea Party event in early-voting South Carolina.

Trump ripped Cruz for his Canadian birth and undisclosed campaign loans, before blasting Cruz’s attacks on “New York values” in a series of tweets.

Trump kept up questions on whether Cruz’s birth in Canada disqualifies him to be president, alluding to previous warnings that lawsuits could bring him down and the GOP with him if he’s the nominee. Read more…

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Trump blasts Cruz on Twitter over Canadian birth and campaign loans

Donald Trump verbally attacks 'son of a b*tch' who installed his mic

Donald Trump verbally attacks ‘son of a b*tch’ who installed his mic

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Donald Trump found a new enemy to target Wednesday night: his microphone

During a campaign event in Pensacola, Florida, Trump went into a tirade over a faulty sound system.

“And by the way, I don’t like this mic,” Trump said after criticizing America’s trade policy with China. “Whoever the hell brought this mic system, don’t pay the son of a bitch who brought it in.”

Trump acknowledges “stupid mic” situation. Tells his advance guy “you hear that George? Don’t pay! I guarantee I’m not paying for this mic.”

— Ali Vitali (@alivitali) January 14, 2016 Read more…

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Donald Trump verbally attacks ‘son of a b*tch’ who installed his mic

Joe Biden: Yes, Donald Trump could be president

Joe Biden: Yes, Donald Trump could be president

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WASHINGTON — Vice President Joe Biden on Tuesday offered a blunt assessment of Donald Trump’s campaign for the Republican presidential nomination, telling NBC News that the businessman could well win the White House in 2016.

“Yes, I think it’s possible,” Biden told NBC’s Today, adding that he hopes that Trump would get “a lot more serious about the issues” if he wins.

“I hope if that were to occur — I hope it doesn’t because I have fundamentally different views than he does — I hope that he gets a lot more serious about the issues, a lot more serious about gaining knowledge about how this nation functions in foreign policy and domestic policy,” Biden said. “But look, that’s a long way off.” Read more…

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Joe Biden: Yes, Donald Trump could be president